Breaking Up Is Hard To Do

I think for me one of the hardest things is deciding if who I am dating is someone I could potentially marry. I have a tendency to “fall in love” quickly. Although in my marriage preparation class I am coming to learn that real love takes time to develop. For this reason in this class I have also learned the importance of taking time to slowly progress in a relationship. It is important to take time to really get to know a person before progressing to a serious relationship.
Recently I broke up with a guy that I have been dating for a month and a half. It has been a really difficult decision and has left me feeling rather empty. Yet there has been something in the back of my mind telling me that I can not marry this guy. I have been ignoring it because I love spending time with him so much. Two Fridays ago my sister asked me if I thought I could marry this guy, considering that I was dating him exclusively. Although I said I realized that this is what dating exclusively meant, it was hard for me to feel right about saying I could marry him.
As I drove home that Friday night I just prayed that God would direct me on what I should do. I felt so confused and upset. My friend called me and came over to talk with me. As we talked out the issue, I began to realize that I had known for sometime that it would be better for me to break up. As I talked to my friend I had a feeling of peace come over me helping me to realize that this would be the best choice.
God will always guide us in decisions that are so important for us. A lot of times our vision and understanding is limited, but He knows what is best for us and will guide us to make that decision. Although I felt like I should break up with my boyfriend, I still loved him a lot and a big part of me did not want to go through with it. I decided to go to the temple to pray about my decision.
In the temple I felt very clearly that it was time for me to make a decision that was best for me. I had been really concerned about hurting my boyfriend and for that reason did not want to end things right away and just wanted to wait for the end of the semester. I felt God letting me know that I needed to make a decision that was best for me.
Despite the peace I had felt, I still worried about what I was doing. In church that Sunday, a lesson talked about choosing between good, better and best decisions. I knew that although I was being blessed by my relationship and was blessing his life as well, that the best choice for me would be to end things and let us both find someone we could potentially marry. I felt the peace of God’s Spirit direct me that this would be the choice to bring me the most happiness.
That night I spoke with my boyfriend and explained that although I loved him, I felt that we did not have a future together. And that because of this it would be best for us to go our separate ways. As I talked to him, I again felt peace that the decision I was making was best. Although I felt this peace, and feel it again as I write this, I still really miss him and feel like a part of me is missing. I think it’s important to remember that these things are not easy, but God will direct us with feelings of peace. These choices prompted by God will lead us to the most happiness, even though in the beginning it is very difficult.